David Holt on TED: Stories and songs of Appalachia

I just sent Geoff a vaguely complete version of the discussion chapter of my thesis. Not massively happy with it, but at least it's something. Now I'm taking a break, and watching David Holt give a performance on TED. Folk songs of Appalachia - some impressive bluegrass.

He's telling stories about people he's known in Appalachia, and playing their songs. First up was his Aunt, who died at age 106. She had a great line: "Time might heal everything, but it's sure no beauty specialist" :)

Now playing the "Mouth Bow", which is kind of like a Jew's harp, but made with a bent stick and a string. You put your mouth near one of the ends on which the string attaches to the stick, and then pluck the string. Quite cool! :)

Fascinating story he just told: Being driven home by his mum, with his brother. They were arguing with their mum and complaining because she wouldn't buy them some sweets (or something...) that they wanted. She flipped, said: "You boys don't know the value of work! Never worked a day in your life..." etc. But then she took things to the next level, and actually pulled over, next to a cotton field, and asked the foreman of a work crew working in the field whether he would get David and his brother to work in the field, so they'd learn...! After a few minutes, their fingers were bleeding; they were crying; mum was looking on impassively.

Then the foreman came up behind him, and whispered to him... and started to sing. And that was what got him into music.

Amazing man.

Anyway. Just wanted to jot down some thoughts about my thesis. It's taken a bit out of me today. Just trying to get myself motivated to think about it. If there's one thing I want to internalise, learn, make a PART of me from this thesis phd experience, it's that you CAN'T AVOID THINGS. I didn't do it intentionally, but over the last year, I've been getting more and more into avoidance. I'm struggling to get myself out of that habit, but I'm going to, because it's painful. I kind of lose hope that I'll ever get done, but the reason for that is that I avoid doing the stuff that needs to be done to get done! As a result, I feel bad; then want to avoid the task more. And the vicious cycle starts.

The funny thing is that when I do "break out" of that funk, then taking a small step of action makes a big difference to my mood. At least momentarily. The problem is that I don't keep going... I keep falling out of the "action" frame.

Ok: So that's a goal to focus on and develop - getting going, and keeping going. I think it's all partly driven by the thoughts I have. It's a cognitive behavioural problem thing. So... perhaps what I should do is start noting down the kinds of thoughts that come into my head when I feel like stopping, and challenge them. Push myself to just keep going a little bit longer.

I did notice that I often "stop" when I'm not sure what to do next... I kind of run out of steam. I'll have to think about that. How do I make sure that I can keep going? How do I get myself to think of the next task when my flow breaks?